Sat, Nov 28th 2009, 8:07 am

I woke up this morning sometime after 5:00 am. That's the time we usually get up during the week to go to the gym, but MSU doesn't open until 10. That's okay though, I've got a fully functioning gym in my home. I think I'll catch a early morning workout (shoulders) then go to the gym and train back.

I've enjoyed have the last couple of days off. This time of year is great for being off and having more time to relax. I cannot believe this year is almost over! Where did it go? I was reading some earlier posts, and I accomplished exactly what I said I would this year. I feel so good about that. My career has taken off; I got my dream vehicle; I just celebrated 13 years of marriage with my spouse;I took a year off from competing; I went on vacation; I got my mind set straight about the things I would like to accomplish; I have a direct path as to how to get there.

I realize I haven't mentioned my Savior, and it is not because we have not been close. I think God is responsible for all these things coming to be. We are working on one last thing though. I need to get some closure for myself about some areas in my life I've allowed to distract  and hurt me. I figured out that sometimes aversion is best in many situations because if one is in a toxic situation it only makes you more sick if you stay there. Let's take sweets for example, if you are the kind of person who cannot just have one piece without eating the whole thing, it is best you avoid the temptation. I used to be addicted to Crunch and Munch. Everytime I would check out at Walmart I would hear a voice that said, "Ummm, don't you want a box of that? It would taste so good! Just one small box, it won't hurt anything and never touch them again." But that 'never', NEVER happened. I decided to break my behavior down into steps or stages to figure out what I could change. I figured out that I was most tempted when I was at the checkout line. So I decided to either distract myself or checkout in another line that didn't have that item. I went through some withdrawals, but eventually it worked! I've been clean for about 9 months! For me that was a trigger food.

You can apply that same process to anything that you have a problem with. Let's say it's not having the motivation to exercise or a negative person in particular. List what the problem is, then break it down into steps. Figure out a solution for each step. Then decide which solution you would be more apt to take. Then stick to your guns! You do have control over yourself, actions and thoughts. God says you do! It says in the bible that you have to take every thought captive. I had a hard time understanding that, but as I grow in Christ this is what I see it to mean. If you have a bad thought or say something negative, tell yourself the truth about the situation, cast down the negative thought, then say something positive. Also surround yourself with positive supportive people. It never benefits me to be upset, anger, and defensive. I don't grow where there is controversy. I flourish where there is peace and harmony. I have to do that for myself. 

Don't get me wrong, I understand a person needs hard times to build charactor. That is not what I'm talking about. I mean the unnecessary stuff, like believing lies that a negative person would say to others about you. Or thinking you aren't capable to complete a task because it has taken you a while or you may have failed at attaining the goal. I've had a pretty rough life, but you would never know it. God seems to preserve my innocence, life, beauty, virtue, strength, excitement, zest, and dreams! The reason is that I chose to believe what God says about me, not man. I've seen people who carry bitterness around and it really shows. It can manifest in many ways like cancer, back problems, hardened scoul look on your face that remains, everything you talk about is negative, people don't want to be around you, and so on.

So I say all of that to say love yourself, believe the good, find out who God says you are and believe Him. He will lift your heart, head, spirit and life! It seems as soon as I get delt a blow God picks me right back up. I believe in myself. I have goodness and love to share. I'm a virtuous wife. I belong to God the Most High. I KNOW that!

Loved, Aketa